Week Seventeen: Appreciating Difference

Having recently returned from a second trip to Spain, where I went for courses of language immersion, I find myself missing the delight of exploring language and diversity in an intensive, focused setting. Even as all the students in the two schools I attended spoke a common language – Spanish – we had as the subject of many discussions the assumptions that were the underpinnings of our individual interpretations of reality, of the differences between us. As people from many countries, we had an opportunity to bump into our own assumptions, explore what we enjoy doing, our political ideas, spiritual beliefs, cultural habits and beliefs about life. The fun was in discovering the differences between us, even as we repeatedly experienced undeniable similarities.

As I relished the variety we represented, I found myself thinking about the ways in which differences so often form the basis for hatred and fear of one another. Then, I thought about how, in the ecology of Nature, variety is a primary source of health and vitality. When a forest is planted with only one kind of tree, it is extremely vulnerable to destruction by pests that evolve to attack that particular kind of tree. When there are different kinds of trees, the forest as a whole has a better chance of surviving as a thriving environment because pests can only destroy a small percentage of the trees living there. Our class discussions reminded me of this aspect of Nature’s wisdom – we each had an opportunity to experience the unique piece of culture and belief that we carry with us and, together, we created a tapestry of colors and qualities that none of us had entirely within ourselves.

For this week’s experiment, I’d like to invite you to explore your relationship with difference. When you meet someone who looks different from you, or who may have an accent when they speak English, or may eat foods that are foreign to you, or may have a lifestyle that is very different from what you have and do, what are your initial responses? Do you move into curiosity and engagement, or do you find yourself pulling away into judgment or fear – or do you have some other response? Remember to notice your reactions with compassion and curiosity. This is an invitation to simply become conscious of your experience of the presence of that which is different from you. Most of us learn to fear or judge what we don’t know or understand and it takes practice to shift this immediate response into curiosity and openness.

As you might enjoy a garden planted with a variety of blossoming flowers, play with your experience of enjoying as much diversity as possible, of being in the presence of what is truly different from you. Wherever you find yourself pulling back, ask yourself what would help you to remember to engage curiosity, to be willing to learn about the differences you encounter in others.

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