Walking across Central Park one surprisingly warm evening, I heard no less than seven different languages, none of them English. It was a delight to notice families enjoying the park, couples having time together, and friends walking along, immersed in conversation. I didn’t understand anything they were saying, but their body language and faces conveyed their pleasure at being in the park that evening.

As I listened to the rhythm and tone of the various languages, I thought about how the most vibrant and healthy ecosystems in Nature are those within which there is a maximum of diversity. Then, I began to think about how our genetic and cultural diversity as a human species adds to our vitality and resilience. I thought about how ecosystems become threatened if the number of species diminishes because each critter and plant has its role to play in the vitality and strength of the whole system.

Then, I got to wondering again how each of us supports and explores our relationship to diversity, within our own families and communities, as well as in the world at large. One of the hallmarks of dysfunctional family systems is an intolerance of difference. In a dysfunctional family, if members have goals, beliefs, or ways of being that are different from those of the parents, this kind of difference can lead to disapproval, abandonment, or humiliation. And so, I began to wonder how each of us handles our relationship with difference. Are you open to the differences you discover in family members or close friends? How do you feel when you find yourself in an environment where the people or activities are different from what you usually experience? As you look at the world scene, what’s your response to cultures, beliefs, and practices that are decidedly different from your own?

Also, when we fear diversity and difference, which we all are taught to do in a variety of ways, we tend to fend off, attack, or attempt to overcome the differences we encounter in the world. This stance leads to a sense of tension that can alienate us from ourselves as well as others, because we lose our ability to move into the present moment with curiosity and openness.
For this week’s experiment, I invite you to spend some time with your relationship to diversity and difference. With your “benevolent observer/witness” as your point of awareness (so you won’t fall into judging yourself for whatever comes up), notice your immediate and automatic responses to difference and diversity. If it makes you uncomfortable when a family member or friend talks about something you don’t respect or like – a religion, hobby, kind of music, particular person – notice what happens in you. If you slip into judgment, which is a habit most of us have, notice that and see what happens if you invite yourself into an open-hearted stance of acknowledging the inevitability and value of difference. This doesn’t require you to agree with the person at all. It just asks that you notice what happens if you give others the freedom to be themselves in the same ways you’d like for yourself, and to acknowledge that diversity is natural and necessary.

As with all the experiments, bring curiosity along as your constant companion on this one, as well as a commitment not to judge yourself for whatever you discover. All of us have our share of preconceptions and stereotypes. The key here is to become more consciously aware of them so that you can discover your relationship to diversity and difference.