I was reading an article on marital therapy in a recent issue of The Networker magazine – a wonderful publication for therapists. In the article, we were reminded that happy couples tend to give each other positive input a good deal of the time – in small and large ways. One of the ways is taking the time to say kind things to one another while moving through the everyday stuff of life.

Reading this article got me to thinking about how powerful it is when we remember to be kind to ourselves and to one another. Focusing on a commitment to be kind changes the quality of daily life – both in the small interactions we have all the time, and in the overall feeling of how it is to be in the world. When we’re in a world where kindness is the foundation of our everyday interactions, there is a sense of connection and well-being that we lose when we experience our daily environment as unfriendly or hostile.

For this week’s experiment, I invite you to say at least one kind thing to at least one person each day. Explore your experience of anticipating saying something kind and then how it is for you when you actually do so. Notice the response of the other person, and the quality of the interaction you share. This doesn’t have to be a person you know well. It could be a clerk at the store, the mail carrier, a neighbor walking the dog. It could also be someone you know and love well. The key isn’t the “who” of it, it’s the process of taking the time to share kind words with someone else.

The words of kindness you choose to share may be an expression of gratitude, or a comment that conveys friendliness or affiliation. For example, I recall saying to a woman in the park how much I appreciate her smile each morning. It’s one of the moments that brightens my day. I also recall the chat I had with a store clerk – just small talk, but taking the time to connect since there wasn’t a line of people behind me. It wasn’t about the conversation. It’s about the kindness implied in our willingness to connect with another human being in a way that expresses their value to us.

As you go through the week, notice what it’s like to give yourself permission to actually say the kind things you think about people along the way but tend not to express. We all know what it’s like to have a moment come upon us that’s just perfect for sharing something with someone and then we let it go by because we didn’t jump in. For this week, I invite you to jump in and see what happens. The goal isn’t to get anything back. It’s to notice what it’s like when you focus on being kind, and on sharing that kindness with others.