| Week
144: |
Choosing Not To Feed Thoughts
that Diminish |
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A couple of weeks ago, walking through
the park, I began to have some thoughts that moved me in the direction
of shame. As I
became aware of the process, I dropped into what I realized was a
choice point. I could either continue to develop the thoughts
and feed the shame that threatened to build, or I could literally
drop the subject and choose, instead, to focus on the beauty of the
trees all around me. As I shifted my attention from the shame
thoughts to the green of the trees and the sound of the birds, I increasingly
noticed that my mood shifted automatically and the shame thoughts
completely disappeared. To this day, I can’t recall what
triggered the thoughts, or what they were. They moved into the
background, and then out, of my awareness.
This week’s experiment invites you to become aware of how
and when you feed thoughts that diminish your sense of well-being. We
feed thoughts by either projecting into the future with our worries
and distress, or by reviewing past transgressions or failures. Once
you become aware of how you feed your distressing thoughts, the next
step is to practice stopping – right in the middle of a thought,
just stopping. It’s a pure act of will. Then, focus
your attention on something that conveys a sense of beauty, calm,
resilience, inspiration – whatever offers support to a sense
of well-being. As you do this, the old, distressing thoughts,
will move on through. They can only stay in place when you grab
hold of them and feed them in some way. Otherwise, they inevitably
keep moving on out of awareness.
I’ve touched on this kind of process before, and want to
offer it again as it’s a matter of practice, practice, practice
to create new habits and capabilities. As with all the experiments,
allow yourself to bring curiosity to this one. Pay particular
attention to the difference in body states as you move from distressing
thoughts to something that inspires and nourishes you. It may
surprise to you to discover that you really *can* shift from distress
to well-being by deciding where to focus your awareness and attention. And,
you may also discover that it requires some real effort to shift your
thinking. Please keep in mind the difference between effort
and struggle. Effort is like building new muscle and we often
have to exert ourselves when we engage in muscle building. Struggle
is a whole different response, which fights with what is.
And so, I invite you to play with this week’s
experiment and notice what you discover.
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